Max 89.7 FM presents to you ‘Abu-ban,’ the show that discusses real-life relationships and marital issues with renowned socialite Abena Manokekame, the moderator of the popular Facebook group ‘Unsingle Me.’
Below is a brother’s dilemma on discussion for tonight, April 26, 2024.
Hi, Sister Abena. I hope you’re doing well. Do not judge me wrongly; I’m only human. Suggestions and criticism are welcome.
There is this lady I met on your page somewhere in May 2022, but I never knew it was the greatest mistake I’m making. I’m a health worker and an indoor type; I hardly go out or make friends, nor do I make calls either.
There is a point in a man’s life where he needs someone to marry or a companion. Note: I don’t know how to treat a lady badly.
Back to my story: I met her on your page and asked her out, and she accepted, though it’s a long-distance relationship. Even without seeing her because I have good intentions for her, I sent her money (GHS 100) for lunch, and in 3 days’ time, I traveled to where she lived in Accra in a bus, which is about a 12-hour drive, to see her place. When I left, I gave her money (GHS 500).
I placed this girl on a monthly allowance (GHS 400). Sometimes it finishes, and I have to top it up for her with either 100, 150, or GHS 200, and sometimes I may get a per diem and still give her a part.
So one day around October 2022, she told me her pastor had found her a protocol in one of the security services (immigration), and the person was taking GHS 10, 000. I told her I’m not married to her, so it will be a loan she has to pay back, and she agreed. I took a loan of GHS 10,500 with an interest rate of GHS 4,600, making GHS 15,100, which I am almost done paying. I told her I would waive off the interest for her; she should only refund the GHS 10,000 to me.
She led two of her big sisters to come for GHS 15,750 and GHS 2700, respectively, to add up and import rice to be refunded in one week’s time. It is almost 2 years now; the sister has paid only 4,150 and does not pick up my calls whenever I call, and the one owing GHS 2,700 has even blocked my calls and WhatsApp.
Mind you, the lady has been to my place just once due to distance. But I realized her attitude is not good from my own perspective, which I do not want to put out here, except for one.
She lied to me that back in school she took money from someone to pay a friend’s fees, and the friend has blocked her, and the person she took the money from wants to arrest her. I had to pay GHS 1,900 out of GHS 2,400, but later realized it was money she took for her sister, which she couldn’t pay. You see how wicked and insensitive some women can be?
For the allowances I gave her and all other stipends, including the interest of GHS 5,100 on the loan I waived off for her, is my background case; even after correcting her Ghana card, she claimed it was 500gh, which I paid, which is still my background case.
My foremost issue is her refunding the GHS 10,000 and her sisters refunding her remaining balance of GHS 11,600 and GHS 2,700, respectively.
Now the issue with why I came to you is that I want to recover my loan from her sisters and the one I gave her for the immigration protocol.
This will make me have a negative attitude and be stingy with women. I wouldn’t like to have anything to do with something long-distance, sorry to say, or with a lady who isn’t working.
